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The apology never given: Finding peace when family won’t

In the village of Fallowmere, nestled among moors and misty pine forests, a tale unfolds of familial bitterness, laughter, and self-discovery. When Uma confronts her toxic family—who would sooner kiss a nettle than apologise for past wrongs—she finds herself on a journey of resilience and grace. Amid poignant introspection, eccentric locals, and her own defiance, Uma learns that sometimes, healing is a solo dance, whether or not her family owns up to their faults.

The Apology Never Given: Finding Peace When Family Won’t

What happened that led me to Fallowmere?

There is a funny thing about families: they are supposed to be the people you can count on, yet, sometimes, they are the ones who drive you furthest away. This, dear reader, is the story of how I came to settle in Fallowmere, a village draped in fog and hemmed in by ancient trees. It was a strange place to heal, but here I was, trying to find peace on the moors.

So, picture this: I am standing on a rolling hillside, the sky so grey it feels like the whole world is lost in twilight, with my only witness the ghostly whisper of the wind. Fallowmere seemed like a fitting backdrop for a woman of my predicament, an unpolished gem of a town where folks still muttered about curses and the local witch, Hattie, sold chamomile by the bushel for people’s “bad humours.” Here, I was hoping to leave behind years of unresolved bitterness with my family.

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Why do some families never apologise?

They say blood is thicker than water, but my family, I’d wager, has oil running through their veins. For as long as I remember, they have never apologised for anything. My mother was a master of backhanded compliments, with phrases like, “You look nice, for once,” or “Well, someone’s gained weight.”  Or forever passing comments on my wardrobe!"Is this is what you are going to wear for dinner?" The questions always loaded with I don't know what. 

Yet, no matter the bruises they left on my soul, their own view was set as the morning sun over Fallowmere’s fields. It never changed. Asking for accountability was like demanding winter change its mind and sprout daisies; futile, ridiculous.

One night, after an epic row that left me packing bags, my brother had the gall to say, “Uma, you should have just been grateful for what we gave you.”

Grateful? For a lifetime of gaslighting? The notion was so absurd I had to laugh. And so, I left, not with sadness but a strange sense of liberation. Perhaps they would never acknowledge what they did. Maybe it didn’t even matter anymore.

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Is it possible to find peace without an apology?

The village seemed like the right place to learn how to let go. Fallowmere was a peculiar kind of beautiful, with cobblestone streets overgrown by moss and ivy spilling from every nook. There was a magic about the place—almost a charm—that invited me to heal, in the company of locals who were as eccentric as they were kind.

On my second day, I met Hattie the herbalist. She must have been ninety if she was a day, with a shock of white hair piled atop her head and a face that had more stories in it than a bookshop. She appraised me with a squint.

“You have got sorrow hanging around you, dear,” she murmured, poking a wrinkled finger at my chest. “That will turn your bones sour.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Hattie. It is just my family.” I said it in jest, but she nodded sagely.

“Ah, yes. Families. Often the quickest way to sour milk.”

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How do you move on when others refuse accountability?

I’d like to say that as the days passed, my troubles melted away like fog in the morning, but healing was slower. Yet, something strange happened each time I walked the winding forest paths or met a quirky local in the village square. I grew. I felt stronger, more alive, in a way I never had at home.

One day, I ran into a dapper young man named Wilfred, sporting a tweed coat that looked straight out of a 19th-century wardrobe. Wilfred and I shared a certain stubbornness, it seemed, for he refused to call me anything but “madam.”

“Madam, it is an absolute pleasure to make your acquaintance,” he would say each time we met, bowing as though he had spotted royalty.

His curiosity about my life in London tickled me. “And what made you come to Fallowmere, madam?”

“I came for peace, Wilfred.”

“Oh, but the village offers much more than that!” he exclaimed, eyes wide. “We have got peculiar mysteries, annual mushroom fairs, and a witch who can cure a man’s melancholy with dandelion tea.”

That dandelion tea, by the way, tasted like liquified grass, but I smiled and sipped politely each time Hattie made a cup.


How do you claim your worth amidst doubts?

As time went on, Fallowmere’s charm worked a strange kind of magic. I realised that even if my family never apologised, I could still choose to forgive them—or, if not forgive, release them. I was enough, just as I was, and didn’t need validation from them.

One particularly gloomy evening, Wilfred and I were out wandering the edge of the moors when he asked, “Madam, is it true your family never apologised for their wrongs?”

I smiled. “True as the sun setting in the west.”

“Dreadful business, that,” he said, with an expression of profound disgust. “One cannot imagine living in such perpetual lack of grace.”

“But, Wilfred, not everyone can face their own faults,” I replied, surprised at my own calmness.

He nodded thoughtfully. “Yet, you have done so. I must say, madam, your strength is far more remarkable than any apology could ever be.”


Would you give up seeking closure?

With the seasons, the villagers became like a new family to me. Wilfred, in particular, offered quiet support. Though he was as straight-laced as a shoelace, he had a kind heart, and with every misstep, every sarcasm and self-doubt I shared with him, he listened. He didn’t judge. He didn’t expect perfection.

One evening, I found myself in the village square, under a sky full of stars, just laughing—laughing with Wilfred, laughing at the absurdity of it all. For the first time in years, I felt free.


Frequently asked Questions:

Can you truly heal without an apology?

Yes! It may take time, but forgiveness—or even releasing—can be deeply empowering and entirely within one’s control.

How can I find peace if my family doesn’t understand my pain?

Try focusing on building your own support network, practicing self-love, and trusting that understanding yourself is more important than being understood by others.

Are there ways to let go of bitterness without ignoring the hurt?

Acknowledging pain is crucial. Let yourself feel, grieve, and then release the negative emotions, often through journaling, therapy, or meditation.

Author

Tushar Mangl, Energy Healer, Counsellor, and Author of The Avenging Act, shares insights on personal finance, mental health, and a greener, better society. For more, subscribe to Tushar’s YouTube Channel!

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